Surprise! Republicans agree to health care reform! No, wait…
Surprise!
Republicans agree to health care reform!
Ha-ha-ha…Wait, no they didn’t.
Despite repeated attempts Thursday to come together, sitting around a square hollow table, over 30 of our nation’s most distinguished square hollow legislators continued to fuss and fight.
And 30 more people died while they were arguing. At least, statistics suggest so.
At the beginning, President Obama acknowledged Democrats and Republicans have different views of the world but insisted, bless his heart, they could talk out differences.
No, they can’t. No Kumbaya…no hookah will help.
“I don’t know that those gaps can be bridged and it may be that at the end of the day we come out of here saying, ‘Well, we’ve had some honest disagreements,’” the president said, according to the New York Times reporting. “But I’d like to make sure that this discussion is actually a discussion and not just us trading talking points.”
Yea, but the Republicans can’t help sling talking points and proceeded to do so for the rest of the day.
Whatever.
Before it was even over, Republicans were launching press releases saying the summit was a failure. And the National Republican Campaign Committee produced a satirical ad on the Innertubes comparing the summit to a scary movie with the message: “They’re trying to cram it down your throat.”
This was not, to be clear, any comment on recent sex scandals that have plagued Republican office holders.
What’s even more clear is that despite every effort, the GOP is not going to give Obama any chance at all to “win” at anything – including and especially health care because…well…that might actually benefit Americans.
So, in the end, Obama said he’d give the lawmakers six weeks to agree and if the Republicans still won’t agree, well, maybe then we’ll go back to that old “majority rules” thingy and pass it without their help.
From the start, GOP minions were alive and well – and mouthing off on the InnerTubes and in Magical Twitterland.
“Thanks for your opening comments, Obama. We’re all dumber for having heard them,” wrote one Right-Wing Twit.
“Obama saying Common Sense & Healthcare in same sentence is like Jihadist praying to Jesus Christ,” said another.
“Exactly when did we change from WE THE PEOPLE to WE THE CONGRESS?,” asked one more (Answer: hum, it’s called The Constitution.)
“If healthcare is a right, why is food not a right too? Food is more important for survival than healthcare.”
Okay, whatever the point was of that last one.
Here’s the deal: Democrats have the majority in both the House and the Senate. The American people are behind you. This is what we voted for in 2008.
Just do it.
