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Tax deal: we can all cry.

taxes

BREAKING: Federal judge in Virginia rules unconstitutional key provision of Obama health care reform bill…but refuses to freeze it or invalidate it. Go figure.

Ring, Christmas bells, merrily ring…tell all the world the tax deal is king…”

Oh, the weather outside is frightful but the tax talk is so delightful. But since we’ve no place to go, let the snow job go on in the Congress…” Or something like that.

It’s a good tax deal, says the White House and the Congressional Republicans and most Congressional Democrats – except, of course, those looking out for the working people of ‘Murka.

Take Sen. Bernie Sanders, for example. Bless his heart, he stood for 8.5 hours on the Senate floor Friday afternoon and into the evening filibustering the tax deal. It was a real filibuster, too, not those fake or threatened filibusters the Senate Republicans have used so effectively to frightening their Democratic colleagues.

Sanders actually took the floor of the Senate and kept talking for over eight hours, without stopping except to catch his breath, never relinquishing the floor.

But the tax deal will be adopted anyway.

President Clinton says the deal is as good as we’re gonna get in this era of Republican insistence on tax breaks for the millionaires and billionaires.

The New York Times this morning points out a “hefty chunk” of the deal, which will add nearly $900 billion to the deficit, is really good for the middle class – what’s left of it – and will benefit, too, the lower class – which is the rest of us outside the top 2 percent of the wealthiest.

The good ol’ New York Times, the Gray Lady; remember when it thought going to war in Iraq was such a great idea?

Anyway, the NYTimes piece points out the annual adjustment to the alternative minimum tax will increase in 2011 insulating couples making as much as $74,450, up from the current limit of $72,450. This will cost $137 billion.

Actual wage earners, if any remain, will also see a reduction in the Social Security tax. A one-year payroll tax cut for incomes up to $106,800 will go from 6.2 percent to 4.2 percent. Couples earning that much will see as much as $4,272 extra in 2011.  That tax break will cost $112 billion.

Extension of the jobless benefits will cost $57 billion.

The deal also includes a temporary repeal of the limit on itemized deductions and an absolute repeal of the scheduled phase out of personal exemptions: another $21 billion to the deficit.

Just makes me want to cry…like John Boehner.

Sure, makes sense: better health care leads to violence!

It’s a good thing we’re finally gonna see the nation’s health care system reformed.

There’s a whole lotta folks out there gonna need some serious medical attention, soon, if this national political discourse gets any more violent! Is mental health care covered in the reforms?

Holy Crap! What’re you people thinkin’? Death threats, spittin’ at members of Congress, callin’ ‘em horrible names, throwin’ money at Parkinson’s patients…and that’s just in my family!

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they put me under the jail and throw away the key.”

“Not the golfers, you idiot. The gofers!”  (Slaps Carl with Tam O’Shanter.)

“Oh…we can do that. We don’t even need a license.”

Even the centered, staid NPR felt like it had to devote nearly an hour Thursday to the violent rhetoric and threats peeling across the political marketplace.

And then, of course, comes along the Faux New Channel – whistling and rolling eyes – saying it’s a “bad atmosphere” and wondering where all this comes from?

Gee, can’t figure it out.

The good news is Glenn Beck has is all figured out: It’s the radical bomb-throwing hippies of the 1960s, the people now in charge of the fedrul gov’munt; they are the ones poking and prodding the teabaggers into atrocious threats of violence.

All we need, says Beck, is the finger of God.

Glad we have Sarah Palin who’s promised to – seriously – “target” members of Congress who voted in favor of healthcare reform.

“Commonsense Conservatives & lovers of America: Don’t Retreat, Instead – RELOAD!” Palin shouted on the Twittermachine.

And on her Facebook page, Palin displayed a map of her targeted congressional members, with gun sights to locate their districts.

“Well aim for these races and many others,” she writes. “This is just the first salvo in a fight to elect people across the nation who will bring common sense to Washington.”

Yep, the common sense of targeting and aiming and salvos…peaceful talk.

Nope, just can’t imagine where all these poor teabagger folks are getting the notion to be angry and violent.

Peace to you.

GOP keeps fightin’ for poor health…but good tans!

It’s all becoming clear, now, why Republicans fought so hard to keep Americans from getting better health care.

Hidden among the many provisions of the new communist manifesto – better know as health care reform – is a 10 percent tax on tanning salons! It’s an outrage!

No wonder House Majority Leader John Boehner was livid…and vivid! He should be. The average person pays $15 to $20 per 10-minute session to lay nekkid on a bed of fluorescent lights and get zapped like a doughnut. With this 10 percent tax, they’ll have to pay an additional $1.50 to $2.00.

Lord only knows how much more this will cost Boehner! Is there no end to this socialist-fascist-communist-Kenyan-rastafarian-zoroastrian-baptist takeover of our tanning rights???

What’s next? Are they gonna charge us more for liquor and cigarettes and Twinkies?

Oh…wait…the bill was all about ‘Murkins getting healthier. Nevermind.

Not to worry. Approximately 13 of the nation’s state attorneys general have it all under control.

Led by Florida’s AG – who also happens to be a GOP candidate for governor of the Fluorescent Light Tanning Bed State – the generals are using taxpayer dollars to file suit against the tanning bed surcharge bill saying it’s downright unconstitutional and against Jesus.

Using an argument for individual rights and states’ rights (yep, the same argument used to justify slavery), Florida AG Bill McCollum-Gollum said the fed’rul guv’munt can’t force him to get treated by a doctor if he don’t damn well want to!

“The healthcare reform legislation passed by the U.S. House of Representatives…clearly violates the U.S. Constitution and infringes on each states’ sovereignty,” said. McCollum-Gollum.

Legal experts around the country were quick to point out, after convulsing in laughter, the AGs’ lawsuit has about as much chance at succeeding as a snowball on a tanning bed. But, they pointed out, it does have a strong chance of wasting lots of state taxpayers’ money.

Sure, the Republicans lost big-time on health care reform and are looking pretty bad and grouchy right now. But don’t think for a minute they’re giving up their effort to keep ‘Murkins from getting better health care. Oh, hell no!

The U.S. Senate contingent of the Grouchy Old Party will be dancing all over procedural rules in the next few hours, trying to delay the inevitable passage of the so-called “fix” bill, which shockingly requires only a majority to pass.

Led by Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn, a doctor fighting against better health care, Republicans will offer up a series of amendments to force Democrats to go on record and vote down things like prohibiting Viagra prescriptions for sex offenders. (Seriously.)

Maybe they’ll bring in Mitt Romney as a guest speaker so he can argue against what he pushed through as governor of Massachusetts. That would be rich.

But, hey, at least ‘Murkins of all stripes are coming around on the notion of better health care.  A USAToday/Gallup poll out this morning says 49 percent of ‘Murkins think the health care reform bill is a good thing with only 40 percent saying it’s bad. (The remaining 11 percent were in the Emergency Room awaiting primary care and could not be reached.)

And, finally…yep, you betcha. Vice-President Joe Biden was right!

Healthcare days are here again…or, maybe, will begin!

Okay, so let’s take a quick look out the window…no, the sky is not falling.

Let’s stand still for just a moment…yes, the earth appears to be still spinning on its axis.

Let’s check the wires…nope, no reports of hordes of mongrel and socialist orcs washing over the Canadian border or from any of the other major industrialized nations with national health care strategies (like all of them).

Is Rush Limbaugh packing his bags for Costa Rica? He’s gonna like it there. Costa Rica has an even better national health care plan than any other nation in the Western Hemisphere!

Ummmm, let me get this straight: the U.S. House of Representatives finally adopted last night a major overhaul of the U.S. health care profit industry and…what? The world is still here? The nation is still standing?

And, what’s that you say? There’s a significant possibility 32 million more Americans than now will have a chance at affordable, decent health care?

As the kids would say…O…M…G!

Does this mean Republicans, who for some unexplained reason really don’t want Americans to have better health care, are going to give up the fight? Oh, hell no!

Before the sun was even up on this new dawn in ‘Murka, attorneys general in eight states (controlled by Republicans) were already talking about filing suit against the health care reform.

“Where in the (U.S.) Constitution does it say that Congress can require somebody to buy health insurance?” asked the South Carolina attorney general.

Ha…Ha…Ha! It doesn’t, of course, but neither does it say African-Americans and women can vote and it certainly doesn’t say a U.S President can invade another country just ‘cause he wants to.

Oh well, this will all just be part of the fun and games over the next few days and weeks and months as the winger nuts, teabaggers and assorted other cretins go nuckin’ futs and heads exploding all over right-wing radio and the Faux News Network.

“A date which will live in infirmary,” reports the Sludge Report. Clever, one must admit.

“Tonight the Democrats voted to put people in jail who have no insurance, raise the costs of health care, destroy the federal government’s bond rating, keep unemployment high and kill forever the mythological creature known as the pro-life Democrat,” reported RedState.com, amid much war-like and violent talk.

Again, pretty dang hilarious. And, oh yea, one big lie.

Okay, so here’s the real deal: If approved by the Senate on Tuesday and signed by the President, the bill will immediately:

  • Prohibit insurance companies from denying children with pre-existing conditions.
  • Provide immediate coverage for pre-existing conditions through a temporary high-risk pool.
  • Prohibit companies from dropping people who get sick.
  • Lower prescription prices for seniors by eliminating the so-called “doughnut hole” in Medicaid drug coverage.
  • Offer tax credits to small businesses that provide coverage for employees.
  • Eliminate lifetime limits and restrictive annual limits on benefits.
  • Require insurance companies to cover children on parents’ plans until the kids are as old as 26 if they can’t get plans of their own.
  • Require new plans to cover preventive services and immunizations.
  • Ensure consumers have access to effective appeals o denials.
  • Require insurance companies to rebate enrollees for excessively high administrative costs.

It’s going to cost $938 billion over 10 years but reduce the federal deficit by $143 billion.

Not bad for nearly 100 years of work.

Canada: “This Means War!” or…health care reform.

BREAKING NEWS: USA defeats Canada, 5-3, in Olympic hockey on Canadian soil!

Canada said to be amassing troops at the border…somewhere along the border…if we can find them…to invade in retaliation!

Okay, not really. But this does not bode well for US-Canadian relations. Making matters worse is the fact the USA is leading in the Canadian Olympics medal count.

How can this happen under an Obama Administration? That’s exactly what Republicans will be asking this week as they gather – reluctantly – under the klieg lights for another Obama Rodeo in which he will, no doubt, rope and hog-tie Congressional Republicans under the guise of getting agreement on health care reform.

Now, he has added incentive: holding off the Canadian invasion threat by trying to make our health care system look more like their health care system. The president will today announce a cap on health insurance premium increases – some of which have topped 31 percent lately – in an effort to appease the unruly and clearly agitated Canadians.

Republicans will be put in a tough spot. They will either have to go along or be blamed for not appeasing the Canadians and acquiescing to the looming invasion.

This is nasty business.

There is good news for Republicans, however. Texas Congressman Ron Paul won the CPAC straw poll over the weekend. Paul, the Libertarian, captured nearly one-third of the votes cast by the nearly one-third of CPAC attendees who bothered to cast a straw poll ballot at all.

This means Paul, who waged an independent run for the presidency in 2008, beat out the ever-lovely and vapid Mitt Romney for CPAC prom king, an embarrassing turn of events for Romney and Massachusetts because “the Mittens” has won the last three CPAC straw polls.

Unfortunately for him, he could not this year get support from even 25 percent of the nearly 30 percent who bothered to vote. Let’s see…25 percent of 30 percent is…divide by three…carry the one…um…not very many people.

And for the record, Sarah Palin only got 7 percent of the vote while Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty, who spoke at the confab, garnered 6 percent of the vote…of the one-third who bothered to vote.

Oh well, the CPAC crowd is always much bigger on bombast and idle threats than on actual participatory democracy so votes and voting – not so much.

Meanwhile, some actually-elected Republicans are having a tough time ‘splainin’ why they so readily accepted money from President Obama’s initial stimulus plan when they railed so loudly against it.

According to the Wall Street Journal, more than a dozen Republican lawmakers supported requests for stimulus money while, at the same time, calling the $787 billion Obama program the worst thing since processed cheese.

Republican Senator Richard Shelby of Alabama, who called the stimulus, “the socialist way,” asked for $15 million in socialist cheese for his state’s cogongrass eradication program.

Wisconsin Republican Congressman Paul Ryan, who called the stimulus a “wasteful spending spree”, asked for enough socialist cheese to create 1,000 new jobs…perhaps in the Wisconsin cheese industry.

Texas Republican Senator John Cornyn explained in a Tweet from his magic Twitter machine there is no hypocrisy in this at all: “No contradiction to vote against reckless stimulus but if majority hell-bent to spend the money anyway, make sure Texas gets fair share.”